Thank you for this. As a western fan, I lack all of this context and nuance, and it really does make a difference not just in regards to the source material but also checking my own western-centric kneejerk assumptions.

(This may be off-topic, but perhaps it'd be relevant in the future? I've always wondered about some of the gendered dynamics in same-sex couples in Chinese, Japanese, and other Asian media. I used to think the way it's treated in the western sides of fandom, particularly the whole uke/seme thing - and now Yunlan referring to Shen Wei as his wife, even though Yunlan is the established bottom? I think? - was just tired ol' heteronormativity being imposed, but I'm assuming I'm missing a lot of context from within those queer communities themselves around stuff like this that would explain why it seems so common?)